BWAHAHAHA

Bwahaha.

Tibalah masanya untuk aku mengaksikan skil bahasa ibunda saya. Telah berpuluh-puluh tahun aku berpeluh untuk mendapatkan gred yang baik dalam SPM BM.

Tetapi.

Masa berlalu.

Telah lama aku tidak mengunakan bahasa malaysia untuk menulis Lagi-lagi... lagi (adakah itu betul? Lagi-lagi... lagi? Cheh, aku tidak peduli), pada masa silam, bahasa yang telah saya guna adalah untuk karangan yang berbentuk:

Yang berbahagia Tuk Penghulu, yang besar Guru Besar, dif-dif kehormat dan orang-orang yang lain. Salam sejahtera dan selamat pagi saya ucapkan. Pada pagi ini, kita berada di dewan ini untuk meraikan Hari Ibu. Oh ibu, kami meraikan mu. Telahpun you bersusah payah melahirkan kami. Oh aku terasa, tersangat terpindah ("moved"). Sekian, terima kasih.

Itulah dia, karangan saya, pada masa yang silam. Sekarang, skil menulis aku telah merosot sedikit, tetapi, aku tidak akan berputus asa, aku akan terus berjuang untuk, MeNulis.

Sebenarnya, aku sepatutnya dah balik. Sebenarnya, aku sepatutnya berada di rumah saya, mengoncang kaki, menengok tv, membuli anjing saya. Tetapi TIDAK. TIDAK. Aku tidak berbuat demikian. Di sebaliknya, aku masih berada di tempat kerja aku.

Kamu menanya, "Buat apa?"
Aku menjawab, "Buat tahi Jack ('doing Jack shit')"

Hohoho.

Kelakarnya aku.

Hohoho.

Tetapi, hatiku pedih, menanti bos aku.

Saya tidak menganggap ini sebagai kelakar tau tak?

ok.

bai

I PUT TO YOU A ?

Really... is it VERY surprising that I'm itching to throw down my pseudo-gloves and run screaming from this place, to wherever will hire my ass?

It's almost 8. And I'm spending my time, WAITING, waiting I tell you, for a minute with boss. He says we'd be done at 830pm. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

He talks. And talks. And just won't stop tawking.

I rot.

NEW(?) ADDITION

There is a new dog in my house.

My previous dogs are listed as follows:

1. Wo-wo
2. Bobby
3. Boy
4. Beebee

Which has caused shazzeroni much concern and many sleepness nights, because apparently stupid names breed stupid dogs. She has been proven right so far, with all of my dogs turning out to be afflicted by the same brand of canine down syndrome. Fortunately they are all very pretty, stupidly affectionate, and very very bully-able, so I overlook their lack of intelligence.

Anyway. So, we had a "Talk" and she sat me down sternly and told me I should never ever ever name my dogs really stupid names again. So I said yes. Ok. You are right.

And then there was this new dog. Sort of wandered around into my house. Introduced himself to my family by peeing around on the couch, tearing apart a few cushions, leaving a very distinctive pong wherever he wanders (and that's everywhere). Anyway I suspect he's here to stay, although my other current dog is currently trying to kill him with devious sneaky little doggish ploys.

ANYWAY ANYWAY I DIGRESS.

The dog. I named him SEBASTIAN. after Sebastian Faulkner, Sebastian the Lobster (Little Mermaid), Sebastian Bach, NOT Guy Sebastian.

But now, he only ever answers to King-King. Because that's what me mom calls him.

So much for respectable dog names.

NOW PLAYING: QUEEN

I just bought my very obsessed artist friend a vague book on ships a'la Lord Nelson, the gay admiral. Which could have been a big mistake. I'm thinking it is. For example, let's say you knew someone who had a very unhealthy obsession with... say... drugs. Mind-altering, health destroying drugs. Would you, as a friend, go right out and purchase a Do-It-Yourself book on homemade cocain?

I didn't think so.

But that's kind of what I did.

And you can read all about it on her blog. http://bettasimplex.blogspot.com

On another completely different note,

I'm still at work. The bosses are holed up in the conference, in some sort of hush hush high powered pow-wow, most of the associates are toodling off elsewhere in "meetings" with "clients", so the office is pretty empty. Things are dropping off the edge of my desk, because my to-do box has been neglected for a while. Sheets of papers are taking a life of their own, surreptitiously crawling over to my colleague's side of the table, and therefore making itself HER to-do stuff, not MINE. Bwahahahaha.

Am listening to the ever brilliant music of QUEEN.

I just can't bring myself to just open the file and start working on the last leg of my project. What the hell, it was suppose to have been completed YESTERDAY!! Acceptable post-project presentation behaviour includes:

1. Awed silence, followed by
2. Thunderous applause
3. " You are brilliant. Here is my company. Run it."

Cheh

OK ASSHOLES

Ok Assholes.

I've read some things you've had to say about racism and all that jazz.

Let me make a few things clear. If you are some sort of spamming robot, I hope you catch a virus and die. If you are some sort of wandering vigilante scouring the internet for Malaysian blogs on which to spew your ANONYMOUS racist thoughts, do it somewhere else. I don't know, write to The Star for god's sake.

Look, if you're going to be too much of a weener, to put your name, to your very very strong views on racial policies and how fucked up this country really is, nobody is going to care about what you say. If you truly believe in it, you wouldn't have to hide behind names like "vovo". (Of course if your given name really is vovo, my apologies, and can I recommend a good psychiatrist for your parents?)

Look everyone has a right to express your opinion.

If I met you at a coffeeshop, and we started a conversation, and you said all that you said to me, then fine. It is a PUBLIC FORUM.

This is NOT A PUBLIC FORUM.

This is my goddamned blog.

And I will have none of this nonsense going on.

Unless I deign to start it first.

Now, go away, for I have deleted your comments, nobody read them anyway. Except for me. But I don't count, because I'm not going to do a damned thing about it except delete trash that you post here.

Get a hobby.

TO GO TO HEAVEN

GEMS OF WISDOM

Little nuggets of awe-inspiring wisdom from the Boss:

1. You know, no one taught me this
2. Notice how I'm a very action oriented person
3. You people don't know how lucky you are
4. Knowledge sharing
5. Fucker
6. I think you're beginning to realize how I am ((insert positive adjective))
7. You guys think I'm... ((insert random name)) bad is worse!
8. Notice how I am very busy, but I have the time to pay attention to details
9. I've never met ((insert random bigshot name)), but he knows us (me) and loves us (me), and wants to shower us with money!
10. Call a spade a spade

I write lots of shit about this man, but secretly in some weird way, I think he's ok. Which is high praise for him. He's just, young, brash and can be really abrasive at times. But his heart is in the right place. An annoying, but good man. Very annoying.

So yesterday I went for this art gallery opening at Reka Art Space. (For all you sad gits out there who are not "in" the cool art scene, Reka shows all the stuff from budding artists. Not all the oldish pompous ones who prance around in orange indian sarongs making thousands of dollars a minute. No these are the real starving artists, on the edge, hungry, and just trying to Make Good Art. Sometimes they make Not So Good Art, but the effort is there and we must applaud them for it)

A sidenote, I was invited to the opening, ergo, I am cool.

Anyway, there was this Christmas tree there, and this art person had put alot of used condoms, stuffed them into unused ones, blew them up, and hung it on the tree. I don't think Baby Jesus would approve. Really.

It was weirdly fascinating, like watching dogs hump. Its wrong, but you can't help but stare.

Anyway, it was selling for RM500.

....

Sorry. It's just that I don't think I would pay 500 bucks for the pleasure of having an ornamental sperm bank in my living room. But it was a neat idea nevertheless, and I think the artist probably didn't really expect anyone to actually buy it. Unless the buyer turned out to be a PSYCHOPATH.

Heh.

Anyway. I'm writing alot because I have an exam on Sunday.

If you have been reading my blog posts, you will know what that means.

Very prolific time for me. Exams.

Also I'm writing from a Jaring dial-up because my stupid Ethernet modem bailed out on me. WHY??? WHHHHHHHHYYYYY???

Enough drama for the day.

cheerio. toodle-doo.